Kickball Standings, For Your Amusement

. Team Mercy Wins Wins Losses Mercy Losses Ties Winning % Games . . Prison 4 12 3 1 0.925 20 . John Cougar Mellancamps 2 14 3 0.895 19 . New Frontiersmen 3 16 4 2 0.860 25 . Bacon Bits 2 17 4 1 0.854 24 . Ye Olde Fashioneds 4 14 5 1 2 0.792 26.5 . Divine Sisterhood Etc. 3 10 3 2 2 0.738 21 . Dream Team 5 11 7 1 3 0.727 27.5 . Crucial Taunt 6 8 7 1 3 0.725 25.5 . Never Scared 7 9 11 1 0.714 28 . Sugar Tits 2 12 6 1 2 0.681 23.5 . Kickball Fever 2 12 8 1 1 0.633 24.5 . People's Court 3 11 9 2 1 0.593 27 . Continentals 3 8 10 1 2 0.551 24.5 . Government Kickbacks 1 11 8 3 2 0.509 26.5 . Wrecking Crew 3 5 10 1 3 0.489 22.5 . Wyld Stallyns 1 9 12 1 0.478 23 . NYC Fun Club 8 9 1 0.472 18 . Monster Squad 7 8 2 0.471 17

. Commitments 7 8 1 1 0.429 17.5 . Kanguerillas 8 10 1 1 0.415 20.5 . Lightning Turtles 1 7 11 1 0.415 20.5 . La Resistance 3 4 7 6 2 0.380 25 . Gingerballs 1 7 8 5 2 0.373 25.5 . Booze on First 8 10 3 0.356 22.5 . Team Peavy 6 11 1 1 0.333 19.5 . Stallionaires 3 8 2 0.308 13 . Luz Restaurant 1 1 4 3 1 0.261 11.5 . Storm of Lazers 1 2 9 1 0.259 13.5 . Los Piratas Mechanicos 5 11 5 1 0.224 24.5 . Regression Aggression 4 11 3 0.205 19.5 . Bourgy Ballers 5 8 6 0.227 22 . Dolls Kicking Balls 1 1 11 4 0.132 19

Let's talk Playoffs, shall we? First, tradition dictates that everyone advances to the post-season. The founders always believed that any team can win it, or at the very least, spoil a contender's chances. We have 32 teams, so we'll make 8 brackets of 4 teams each. The top 8 will choose which squads are in their respective division. Come September 7th, we start at 1pm, allowing everyone to play twice. Then, on the 14th, everyone plays once. For those three games, we'll award 3 points for a Mercy-Rule, 2 for a regular win, and 1 for a tie. Whoever has the most points will advance to the quarter-finals on the 21st. The Final Day is the 28th.

To all the top 8 contenders: while I believe that some of you are so close to each other that your minor percentage differences are negligible, I do not have the time to host any tie-breakers. Therefore, the top 8 will have to rely on the standings as they are, and if you lost by .002, that's the way the ball bounces, G.

Enjoy! September is always the best.