Kickball Standings, For Your Amusement

Why don't/won't people umpire? Everybody knows the deal, yet we still don't have consistent umpiring. I really don't understand why, but i know this poor cooperation is no good, so i must ensure that teams honor the umpire rule. Therefore, I will be there at the the Queue Table next week to meet the two umpires from each team. I wanna talk to ya, encourage ya, and make it fun. The League pays for your food that night, and you get to meet many people on such an intimate level. Plus, if someone gets out of control, you can send 'em to the showers.

I hope people can understand my frustrations with this. I will respect any call if i feel the umpire is honest, fair, and knowledgeable. I don't care at that point. But i hate to keep reminding everyone to do their share of the umps' duties, it doesn't happen, and then people complain to me about some bullshit call. Furthermore, some players are just incapable of being objective. The games need umpiring.

We should have had at least 12 umpires available Sunday night, still, i only had a maximum of one (1) one ump at a time for my games on the Monster. That blows, and that's it.

To to all teams: send us two good ones every week. The League needs honesty, consistency, and dedicated officials for our precious games. I don't want any more debate due to lack of umping.

Chill.

How did this rag-tag team win the Chuck D. Cup, and, this past Sunday, claim First Place? Because they did what they had to do. The Sleeves know how to win and have the best time doing it. Don't misconstrue Ben "O.B.P." White when he says he'd play the Yankees in Kickball, as he fears them, but game's always on.

I must admit I am somewhat saddened that the turnout was less than 50%. Yes, the day was gloomy and foreboding, but never was the Sky Pouring in Greenpoint, the Sun *did* shine through right at 6, and the Grand Lights illuminated our evening. Please Know, that we are loathe to call off Kickball, and I am happy that our '04 and '05 consecutive Sunday-Streak is approaching DiMaggio stature. Kickball in McCarren Park started April 10th, 2004, with just the Point Boys, some kids, and me. We didn't care because it was cold and it was Easter. The next week, Los Piratas, the Orphans, and the Sullivans came (as well as a cast of others), and the season was set. We did have one day after July 4 where rain shortened the evening, but we still got a nice few games in, including a heart-breaker between the Pirates and the Orphans. LPM needed a big Rally in their bottom 5th inning, and they got it, climaxing with Sports's right field bomb over Tommy's (proprietor of The Mark Bar) head.

There is only one day since 2003 where this Jersey City resident did not go play Brooklyn Kickball, and that was October 15th, 2003. "Wind Day", as Jens and i call it, but it's also known as "Staten Island Ferry Crash Day", is the only time I ever thought no one would come to play Kickball (in Red Hook). But I was a rookie Commish. Sure enough, Jens and a dozen others were there ready to battle high school kids and Mother Nature's gales, while counting on me to bring the equipment. That's the only time I ever let Kickball down, but we have so many more people involved today.

So, know that I will be there, and if you really think Kickball may not be on, call my cell at 908-875-3236, and I will let cha know. If were to be so bold as to cancel Kickball one Sunday, the fear of God must consume me.

Wow. Our very first injury of the season. I feel sorry for poor Ryler, and I have yet to get word on his condition. I give credit to Franz and Moss for starting to raise funds for his medical expenses, and to the young, Mercurial Pirata for getting ice to our fallen player faster than I would have. I sprinted to the Nest to get ice, and I was just across the street when I see the quick Pirata already bolting out of the Nest with a full bag of cold goodness.

We used to have a Nurse, but she would not have helped Ryler's broken hand, wrist, or arm. We must get a first aid kit, though really what Ryler needed was the Emergency Room. Hopefully, B.A. and Jesse Ballgame will organize a Tuesday Night Fundraiser at Black Betty.

THIS IS THE RISK YOU TAKE WHEN U PLAY SPORTS. I am in it with ya. I am older than most players, and I have no medical insurance either. Furthermore, I participate in physical activities far more dangerous than Kickball, such as routinely biking around our Great, Dangerous City. I could be fucked at any time, yet I continue to play and bicycle.

However, I am going to start getting in the face of all retarded players. For instance, last Sunday, at the Red Monster, I kicked a ball down the third baseline, and i was sure to get a single. The third baseman threw it to first, the throw was way off the bag, the first baseman completely blocked the baseline, and we collided. Of course i was pissed. The first baseman has no business blocking the line: it's dangerous, unnecessary, and stupid. The greater the aptitude our players have, the less injuries we'll see.

Also, take time to stretch and do calisthenics. I know it sounds gay, but being in shape is cool when you play sports. David Wells wished God would remove his girth, when he should spend the off-season on Weight Watchers and treadmills.

Getting to other subjects: if you're on a team, please umpire, and get your team to start bringing food for yourselves. I love being Home Base Ump/Lead Chef, as it's a great tradition. The food I help arrange to bring is for the O'Sleeves, the Daggers, the Umps, the Cops, and the other Directors. So, if you are not one of those people, I am not providing food for you. Please bring your own, and we'll help you cook it.

One random thought: I love the Pink Corvettes and am jealous as hell that our beloved Elizabeth Decoursey won't let me play on it! But Liz knows she can do no wrong by me, and I will continue to impose myself as lead fan, promoter, and Machiavellian General Manager. I love you Vettes!

I hope everyone has been having a good time. The complaints have been few, yet i have heard them and reacted to them properly. Anyone can always write the directors. However, I think 99% of us are happy, so, GO BK.

The website overhaul is nearing...stay turned for a better look, more frequent updates, and an Orphanesque trash-talking forum.

Word.

Hello kickballer,

You know, when someone from BKKB calls you a "FOP", it means you must be a...

Friend of the Park!!(And because we're not sure how to pronounce "fotp".)

Er, anyhoo, SATURDAY, MAY 14th is "Friends of the Park" day at McCARREN PARK! On this day, from 11 am - 1 pm, you can help transform "McBarren" park into the glimmering jewel us kickballers deserve! Just show up and help with the clean-up of the park, painting of the sheds, all that good-timey civic-minded crap! SPECIALS that come with being a "FOP" this day include:

Half-Price Team Fees THIS WEEK for ALL TEAMS aiding in "Friend of the Park" DAY!! $2 BROOKLYN BEERS / BUD BOTTLES at Greenpoint's PENCIL FACTORY from 1-4!! So, come to the park on Saturday and do your part, then drink your beer and feel good about yourself and the park that gives you so many good times.

Love,
BKKB

Contact Us if you have any questions, or wish to volunteer.
And remember: NEW PLAYERS STILL, and ALWAYS WELCOME!!Standings listed as soon as we can decide what they are ...BKKB

Getting Somewhere:

In the Sports Section of Thursday's NY Times, Selena Roberts posited this editorial. I guess because I read it a 2 AM, and well before most commuters did, I got the head start with my email to her. I simply forwarded my letter to Senator Bradley, and here was her response at 3:00 PM:

-----Original Message-----From: selena roberts [mailto:selenasports@nytimes.com]
Sent: Thursday, May 05, 2005 3:00 PM
To: Kevin Dailey
Subject: Re: my letter to Senator Bradley about Jeff Van Gundy

hi kevin,

first, thank you for taking the time to share your thoughts. i can appreciate your conviction. you have presented a very passionate and insightful letter to senator bradley.

let me know if you receive a response.

take care,
selena

I know there are a billion more things important than the sanctity of Sports (how the alleged sanctity of the Olympics is ruining our City, stay tuned). However, some issues can only be Championed by a relatively few people. In this case, only Senator Bradley can help. And if his smug Manhattan assisitants don't start giving me the time of day (I doubt whether the Senator has even read my email yet), I will forward his email address to everyone and offer a free week of Kickball to anyone with a great letter to the Senator. Don't worry my fellow Directors, it's on me, not US.

I am so distracted about Jeff Van Gundy, the best NBA Coach Ever, that i can't write about Kickball. I hope you understand and enjoy my letter to former Senator Bill Bradley of New Jersey. Before he was a Senator, Mr. Bradley was a Princeton graduate, a Rhodes Scholar, and member of the Championship Knickerbocker teams of 1970 and 1973. They were among the greatest squads in basketball history.

I Love You Jeff Van Gundy, and if my efforts do you and your league some good, all i ask is that you bring you and all your basketball friends to Kickball one night. Be sure to bring the Knicks' dancers, as you need at least Three (3) Women in the field.

Mr. Van Gundy Throws Out the First Pitch at Shea during the 1999 Mets - Yanks Interleague Play

Dear Senator Bradley,

When I saw the story about Mr. Van Gundy, whom I must assume you know personally, and believe is a great, honest Coach, I was completely aghast. First came the unjust fine of $100,000 (a penny is too much), and now Mr. Stern is considering treating Mr. Van Gundy as if he were Pete Rose.

This controversy raises two issues:

1. In all of Sports, should the Commissioner, who is first and foremost the Chief Promoter of his respective league, be in charge of the Officiating? Is that not an inherent conflict of interest? At the very least, there is the appearance of one, and the suspicions are particularly most vivid in games like football and basketball, where there are so many subjective calls. If a Commissioner runs Promotion, Accounts Receivable, Officiating, and the Lottery Drafts, then how can a fan tell the difference between David Stern and Vince McMahon?

2. Is Mr. Stern good for the NBA? There are so many examples to the contrary (the playoff system, over-expansion, the CBA, and 1997), but on the matter of Mr. Van Gundy, he clearly has abused the power of somebody entrusted with the good of the game. There should be no discussions whatsoever between the Officials and the Commissioner, ever, especially during the Playoffs. There should be no intrigue regarding the officiating. Moreover, when a beloved, respected Coach challenges Mr. Stern on his officiating policy, he receives an unprecedented fine and threats of expulsion.

I implore you to call all parties and resolve this matter. You are the best possible person to establish integrity to the great game you once played. The NBA needs some major changes, and only you and your friends from the league can implement them. If Mr. Stern resists you, then you should publicly question his authority and his system. You are among the few with the clout to force the needed changes in the NBA.

Regarding these issues, you can call on me whenever you wish for whatever you want. My numbers are 201-255-0484, and 908-875-3236. I know you’re in the private sector now, but I have lived in my beloved New Jersey most of my life, and currently reside in nearby Jersey City Heights.

Respectfully, Gratefully,

Kevin Dailey